


won't somebody hold me and tell me it'll all work out

by modernVictoria



Series: Quakerider [9]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Angst, Not A Happy Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-16
Updated: 2018-06-16
Packaged: 2019-05-24 05:28:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 571
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14948427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/modernVictoria/pseuds/modernVictoria
Summary: Robbie's thoughts during 'I go crazy'/Chapter 13 from 'It is good (a Quakerider Fic Playlist)'.





	won't somebody hold me and tell me it'll all work out

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Fierysky](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fierysky/gifts).
  * Inspired by [It is good (A Quakerider Fic Playlist)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14617628) by [modernVictoria](https://archiveofourown.org/users/modernVictoria/pseuds/modernVictoria). 



> Title from 'I go crazy' by Orla Gartland.
> 
> So sorry for the angst <3

“I love you.”

 

He gawked at her, his eyes wide open and his mouth gaping. Daisy waited silently, her face calm, but her insides were churning. Her eyes scanned his face, but a thousand emotions crossed it, making her unable to decipher his expression. 

 

“Say something.” she pleaded silently, tears brimming in her eyes.

 

Robbie came back from the stupor he was in, and took a step backwards. His pupils dilated in fear. Daisy took a trembling breath. Was he scared of her? Was he scared of the curse that followed her? Wherever she goes death follows. She thought he’d understand.

 

“I need to go.” he said as he turned around. 

 

Daisy stared at him as he practically ran away, her heart dropping and shattering in her chest, but him still filling every broken piece.

 

* * *

Every time he closed his eyes, he could see them, faces twisted in disgust and horror. His  _ mamá _ would’ve never wanted this life for him. His  _ papá _ wanted him to become someone honorable, like he had been. Instead he chose killing people.

 

He used to say he had no other choice than choose this life. Fate had killed him and hurt his brother. The devil had tempted him, survival instinct had kicked in, everyone would’ve chosen life over death…

 

In truth, he had chosen this life even before becoming Ghost Rider. It was his idea to go racing. His idea to take Gabe with him.

 

It’s true, he had no way of knowing what would happen that night, but if he had just stayed at home, like Gabe asked him to. If he hadn’t dropped out of school, like Eli had advised him against.

 

If....

 

He wouldn’t have met her.

 

Every choice he made, seemed less heavy at that thought. 

 

An angel with a death wish, giving him a piece of his soul back.

 

Even pale and bruised she looked ethereal.

 

Some bruises had been his own doing.

 

Gabe’s horrified face creeped into his mind. He had peeled Robbie’s hand away like he was infected with some horrible disease. 

 

He was a monster.

 

Why didn’t she see that?

 

“I love you.”

 

He thought he hadn’t heard it right at first. Eyes wide and mouth hanging, he gawked at her. She looked serene as she watched him carefully. 

 

He didn’t deserve her.

 

She was so much better than him.

 

He, a devil aching for some light.

 

She leaned in closer. Her pure bright aura seeping through his cracks. He took a step backwards.

 

He had been in darkness for so long that it had become something familiar. She offered him a way out of it. 

 

He was terrified. It had been such a long time since he had felt that. He was immortal after all.

 

The thought that she had that effect on him, made him even more scared. It must’ve shown on his face, because her calm expression faltered. 

 

He hurt her. He always hurt the people closest to him. Even though there were only two now, he reminded himself, the other three were dead.

 

“I need to go,” he said, acting against all his wants and desires.

 

_ He wanted to take her in his arms. _

 

_ Kiss her. _

 

_ Taste her. _

 

_ Engulf himself in her light. _

 

He’d only taint her with his darkness. 

 

As he turned around, another face faded into his mind. Not disgusted, not horrified, but sad, and that felt so much worse to Robbie.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Let me know if you like it! <3


End file.
